Hello hopeful romantics! This is Radleigh Valentine reporting for duty to help you find that magical relationship you’ve been dreaming of!

Yes, I know. You’ve been waiting and waiting and waiting. You’ve done the healing work. Everyone’s been forgiven (even yourself) and still your soulmate hasn’t shown up. So what’s up with that? It’s not fair!!

Well, don’t give up yet! Here are 10 magical steps for attracting that dreamy person you’ve been looking for.

Get Clear About What You Want

We’re working with the Law of Attraction here. What that means is that the Universe (or God, Source or the Divine – whatever word you like best) will find you a mate that matches your personal vibration. If you’re uncertain about what kind of partner you want or changing your mind a lot, it’s a bit like going into a restaurant and changing your order over and over. Your meal is never going to make it to the table!

Time to make some lists. Find some time for yourself. Make it romantic! (Yes, I’m serious.) Light a few candles, turn on some romantic music, and dim the lights. The time has come to place your order for the perfect romantic partner.

First you’re going to create a “Must Have” list for your soulmate. Things like “emotionally available,” “romantic and kind”, or “successfully employed” might go on that list. Some items will be unique to you. If you’re a very tall person, you might even put “vertically gifted” on your must have list. Hey, it’s your list. Don’t worry what other people would put on their “Must Have” list. Just be honest with yourself as you place your order.

Next you’ll need a “Nice to Have” list. Frankly, the main reason you need one of these is so that your “Must Have” list isn’t unrealistic. In fact, start by reviewing your “Must Have” list. Are there any items on that list that really aren’t “must haves” but are really just “nice to haves?” If so, move them to the “Nice to Have” list. The “Nice to Have” list is often where people put things like “brown hair.” If the perfect person showed up in your life and was blonde, you really wouldn’t care, would you? Well, maybe you would. In which case that belongs on your “Must Have” list.

Finally, you need an “Absolutely Not” list. These are what I call “deal killers.” Items that might fit on that list are things like “addictions”, “anger issues”, or “doesn’t want kids.”

Now you’re ready to place your order!

Visualize Happiness

You’ve got the list. You know what you’re looking for. Time to visualize! Some people like to go through magazines and cut out images that represent what they’re wanting in a mate. It might be that they cut out images of people that match physical traits they prefer. Or it might just be images that depict ideas such as a couple having a romantic meal together or two people hiking through nature. If you like, you can paste these images onto a poster. This is called a “vision board.” Or you can just place them somewhere where you can look at them on a daily basis.

Visualization doesn’t just happen with your eyes, though. It happens in your mind. So each day imagine yourself happily in love with the person you ordered from the Universe.

Let Go of Your Ex

Hopefully you’ve already completed this step, but many people find it difficult. If you are still energetically connected to your ex by doing things like daydreaming of the moment when they will call asking to come back, then it’s like a big can of Soulmate Repellant. Someone new can’t enter your life if the old person is still in your heart.

This is a good time to review your lists. Did you just order up someone just like your ex? If so, that’s a sign that you still have work to do in letting go of the past so that your future mate can manifest into your life.

Make Room for Your Soulmate

There was a time in my life when I was single, but had 2 cars (don’t ask.) I was also looking for a new house. When it came time to purchase a home, I made sure there was a 3-car garage. Why? Because I was visualizing the day when my beloved would arrive and making sure there would be room for their car!

The same is true for your home, your bedroom, and even (gasp!) your closet! Make physical room in your life for your physical soulmate to be able to move in!

Clean Up Your Act

Feng Shui is an ancient Chinese set of principles that reviews what kinds of things are in your home and how they are placed in the space. It has a lot to do with the energy of those objects and how they affect your energy; which in turn, affects how you manifest things like prosperity, career aspirations, and – yes – romance!

The back right corner of your home is the space that has to do with relationships.   It doesn’t matter if that room is your bedroom (though that’s always nice) or the kitchen. What does matter is that the space is orderly, not cluttered, and has the right energy for attracting love. There are many books on the subject as well as endless information on the internet. Or you can hire a Feng Shui expert to go through your home to help you optimize your ability to attract your soul mate.

Get OUT There!

I’m always amazed by the people who are looking for their soulmate but are just expecting them to ring their doorbell. Sadly, unless your beloved is a postal delivery person, that’s unlikely to happen. You have to get out in the world where you can be found! Join clubs that focus on things you’re interested in. Consider doing a little volunteer work for a charity or sign up for a class! Whatever it takes to get you out of your home and out in the world of romance!

Get Your Angels Involved

Angels are messengers from Heaven who love to help you in any way they can. Many of them have specialties – including romance!

Archangel Raphael is known for his match-making skills. You can ask him to help bring your soulmate into your life as soon as possible. Archangel Chamuel is known for being able to see everything and everyone – including the perfect person for you! Both archangels vibrate in the color of green. Raphael is a deep emerald green and Chamuel is a light green. Green is known to be the color of the heart chakra which is just another reason why they are the perfect romance angels to call into your life!

Follow the Signs

Angels (as well as the Divine) love to leave us little signs. Some signs seem to be universal. For example, white feathers are considered to be signs from our angels that they are with you and working on your happiness. Most signs are more tailored to the individual. You might consider red roses to be a message that love is near!

These signs are often messages telling us to keep the faith or even to take particular actions. If you encounter a sign while on your journey to romance and your intuition guides you to take a particular action, then trust that! If you feel that the signs are saying “Yeah, go on that 2nd date” then go for it!

If your intuition says “Run away!” then do that instead.

Love Your Life

The time during which you are single is not wasted. There is much you can do with your life until your soulmate makes their way to you. Be happy! Fill your days with joyful and life affirming activities. The love of life that you feel will radiate out of you making you a beacon of Light for your beloved. If you focus every moment of every day upon the absence of a partner, the partner will remain absent. That’s just the way the Law of Attraction works.


One of my favorite sayings is “Seeing isn’t believing. Believing is seeing.” Know in your heart that you are worthy of love. Be aware every day that nature will not let your amazing ability to love go to waste. Look in the mirror and say “I love you! Someone very soon is going to be one lucky person!” And then believe that.

Because it’s true.