The way that I generally function in life is to keep my challenges to myself until they are resolved. Part of the reason for that is my perception of the Law of Attraction. I don’t like to chat overly much about where things are difficult in life because I don’t want to give power to the words and possibly anchor in the troubles.
However, a conversation that I had last night with my husband Lee has stuck with me. I have decided to break with my regular rules in hopes that in doing so, maybe what we’ve been dealing with will be helpful to some of you “out there.”
The last few days have been rough. Frankly, the last 6 months have been rough. Lee incurred a spinal injury that has largely kept him stuck in bed since early November. Recovery has been slow and arduous with false hopes of progress. We still have no real idea as to when he will be back on his feet and living a normal life. That has made me his primary caretaker. Throw covid – and all that it entails – on top of that and what you wind up with is two very exhausted guys.
Conversely, my career and life purpose are at an all-time high. I have more opportunities to teach and be of service than ever in my life. I can barely keep up!
The conversation that I had with Lee last night was that I felt that we were living in an imbalance of extremes. There’s a famous quote by Charles Dickens that goes “It was the best of times; it was the worst of times.” On one end of the extreme is our personal lives as we try to conquer Lee’s injury and put our lives back to normal. On the other end of the extreme is my career which couldn’t be in a happier place. How this is making me feel, is like the center point of a big piece of taffy being stretched from one end of the room to the other. The thinnest part is the middle. That’s the most unpleasant place and that’s where I feel like I’m living in my life. In the stretched middle of this imbalance of extremes. I want to be happy and celebrate the good parts, but the bad parts are requiring literally my every waking hour.
I am betting that there are people who are reading this and thinking “Yes. This is me. I totally get what Rad is saying. So hard to focus on the good stuff, when the bad stuff demands focus, action, and attention.”
But that brings us back to the Law of Attraction aspect. The good stuff simply must have our attention. It must be focused on and given more than just a passing thought. It’s absolutely imperative that when the taffy of life is stretched to its limits, that we turn our sights to the blessings in our lives and reach out to the angels that love us and exist to help through life’s most challenging times.
If there is a way to not pay attention to life’s difficult demands, then that information has missed my view. Lee needs care and that’s my job. Just like it was my job when Jace (our Shelty boy) needed nursing back from his cancer in January.
Life’s challenges demand our attention. The important thing is to find a way to force ourselves to take time every day, several times a day, and refocus our attention to the good stuff.
In all honesty, I am sharing this with you because I am trying to train myself. I learn more things by teaching others than any other way.
So here’s what I’m going to do. I am going to set a series of alarms on my phone to remind me to stop what I am doing and focus on the joyful things. If I’m tending to Lee and can’t stop what I’m doing in that moment, I’ll just hit snooze so that the alarm will go off again. But the rule will be that I have to eventually stop and focus on the happy things and the promise of the future for at least 10 minutes.
Because, here’s the thing… Lee will get better. He will. How much longer it will take, I don’t know. But he will get better. And once he has, there will be a lightness of being in this house that will be impossible to describe. The joyful times in the future will be all the more joyful because we will have learned not to take blessings for granted.
I sincerely hope that sharing this with you helps you. And if not you personally, maybe you know someone “out there” who is living through an imbalance of extremes that you can share these ideas with.
Angel blessings,
~Radleigh
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Thank you for sharing, it definitely helped me. You are such a lovely sunny positive person, I’m sorry to hear about Lee’s health troubles and hoping he will be back on his feet very soon. Sending love and healing thoughts to you both! Sarah
Thank you so much for sharing! It reminded me about the importance of gratitude. When we are grateful it can change our mindset for sure. I feel guilty sometimes taking time out for things like gratitude, but I know that in the end it will give me more energy for the tough things I combat on a regular basis. You are so kind, thanks again! Sending prayers to you, Lee, and your beloved dog. Marianne
Hi Radleigh
I can absolutely relate to this, as the past 6 months have been quite traumatic for me too.
I have now reached out and started to get help yesterday and my message was very much let go of control.
Your idea of setting an alarm to count my blessings and give gratitude, is definitely something I will be trying. It’s so easy to get swept up in the drama that we forget to see all the ‘good stuff we have going on.
I too, will get through this with the angels by my side
Love and angel blessings to you all xx
Prayers for you and Lee. Being a caregiver is a rough gig, especially when you work. Have you thought of having someone from a home health care service come in maybe once a week or once every other week? That would give you a small respite to get some “thickness” back in your taffy life.
I think we all live at different times in the life you have so delicately Described. Whether we are the caregiver or the one who is receiving the care.
I love the idea of setting the alarm and taking in the goodness of life. When in a life of taffy, you tend to get caught up in the thin part and don’t see a way out. So those 10 minutes are a reset that life has beautiful moments even when it’s hard to see.
I just had neck surgery, and it’s a slow, slow recovery process. I want to get back to what I used to do. My husband had to take care of me before as after the surgery for some time. It’s hard to let someone do things for you even have moments you’re not proud of.
Perhaps the angels and the universe are reminding me to slow down and enjoy life and let someone else help me.
I am sending love and light to both of you. My ArchAngel Rafael provide healing light to Lee.
Hi Rad,
Just keep it up body!
I totally agree about what you said about keeping the things joyful in bad times and I will even add something. It is always hard to take care about someone we love (as they might not be in good mood sometimes) but bringing things to the present and cherish the moment of giving and pouring love to them usually work.
But sometimes we also have to ask them what they would potentially want for this experience to feel a little better as it is not necessary what we would have in mind. I am sure you already know that but sometimes we are so blinded by what we have to do that we don’t take a minute to find out what the person really need and what you need as well so you are not burning yourself up.
This is with so much love that I am thanking you for your support you gave me one day in London when I ask my angels name. I have grown so much more spiritually since and I am now becoming a healer.
So I am sending you all lots and lots of love and healing lights , Ax
Hi Rad,
It brings sadness, reading your post. I appreciate your honesty, a difficult tim for you both. The more people that become aware of your situation, the more prayers you will receive. A problem shared is a problem halved.
Sending you and your husband Lee much love and healing prayers.
Love Mandy ❤❤❤
You have touched my heart with your words. I pray for your continued strength and loving care of Lee and that the alarm on your phone allows you to reset, rest momentarily, see the love, joy and gratitude for the happy places in your life.
Take care of yourself and blessings to Lee and Jace.
Thank you for your wonderful teaching and guidance.
Oh how I know and feel the same every day. My husband and I had great careers in 2014 he had a massive stroke I quit my job to stay home and be his caregiver 24/7 (this year makes 36 together) We pray everyday, I know my Angel or angels are with me but still need to learn how to communicate I started a home based business which requires my time too. 2020 was a challenge but no complaints I know the law of attraction and believe in it ✝️ I am hoping soon we can get some home help and I suggest you do that too (we did my husband not to happy but ended up liking it) it gave me a small break (I felt guilty at first) but then I was happier which my husband was too it was a win win for us both Thank you I truly love your readings gives me hope ✨ been a follower for a long time Thank you
Don’t be so hard on yourself……This too shall pass.
We are not robots and sometimes life happens and your message here also shows how resilient you both are, how strong you are as a couple, its ok to feel a bit flat sometimes. You will get through it Radleigh.
Radleigh, thank you for being so authentic and genuine with this. I personally struggled in this mindset too and found an app that notifies you with an affirmations in your phone. It’s called “I am” and it’s free. Or upgrade for 1.99 a month for unlimited. It has lots of areas of focus to choose from (heartbreak, self love, body, etc.) If anyone needs a constant reminder, I highly recommend this! Speak your life into existence 🙂
Thank you for sharing, my heart goes out to you and Lee. Prayers
God bless you and Lee at this difficult but doable stage. I was my husband’s caregiver for many years. As difficult as it was, I cherished the one on one time I had with him during dressing changers and IV infusions. It was a time when it seemed that no one else existed. It was just us two- no distractions or interruptions. That forced closeness brought us closer together. He was so appreciative of the care and it was the one time that I thought that I was doing something positive when everything else was spiraling out of control.
He has been gone 2 years now and I can look back with admiration at his combined strength and softness during that time. Blessings
Ask and it shall be received. If there is anything i have learnt in retrospect, from giving all of me to my son when is path was extremely turbulent, over a period of 20 years is to have more time for myself. That all depends on the support available to us. Sending “full and complete recovery” to Lee and the ‘Serenity prayer’ to You Radleigh.
Blessing and love..
Much love Rad to you and Lee. I totally get it and am in a similar place in different circumstances though. I think each small thought in the positive makes a huge difference and the angels cushion us. Mat they continue to hold heal,protect you and Lee x
Sending you and Lee light and love. Hoping it helps through this challenging time. You are Amazing – having the strength to share in hopes of helping others and seeing & using the light in the world to help you. Thank you for the Blessing You Are!!!
I’m so sorry about Lee’s injury. I’ve prayed for a quicker than expected healing for him. You’re revelations about actively reminding yourself to think positively and remind yourself of the positive is on point. Valuable information for all of us, thank you!
Thank you so very much for sharing this Radleigh. Infinite Angels hugs, Angels, Angelic love, Angel healing on all levels and all in all ways, in all forms and in all shapes to you and Lee. In love and light.
Hi Rad. You make it sound like Lee is on one side and you are on the other. Don’t you call in angel healing when you’re meditating by yourself? Extend that out. Have angel healing sessions with the two of you holding hands and strengthen that power of intention!
Blessings to you both.
I was guided to read this post. I am praying to Angel Raphael for complete & timely healing for Lee
I am sending much Love and Healing Energy to Lee and you! Along with Archangel Raphael who always always performs healing miracles!!! May you be surrounded with more healing comforting Angels than you ever had!!!
Dearest Rad and Lee,
Yes! I agree. Having been there this past week feeling overcome with disappointment and intense sadness re the world I finally came up for air and returned to the person, Being, Soul of love and light. It is just too easy to succumb to the madness. For me, it was facing my fear of talking about how I was feeling, reading uplifting spiritual literature, listening to guided meditations , prayer, consulting cards that helped me to breathe again. My heart goes out to you as you move through this Taffy period of your life. Sending you loving, supportive energy along with many others to you and Lee. You are so loved.
Thanks Radleigh for sharing.
Things will never be “back to normal” and that’s a good thing!
Through Covid times and through healing both of you will come out of this transformed. Instead of taffy imagine a work out band, solid strength throughout no matter how far it’s stretched!
Adversity and difficulty in life brings wisdom and opportunities. The best lessons we learn in life is from our disappointments and difficulties; as we learn we are bigger than the circumstances.
Blessings to you and Lee!
I totally resonate with this post. Thanks for your courage in sharing. I’m a “go get ’em” person that has had some health problems since December and my lovely husband has been my caretaker. It’s been tough but I do believe that it’s brought us closer and we talk daily about how important it is to focus on gratitude and the positives. I found a wonderful app you and Lee might want to look at. It’s called “Curable” and deals with the science behind the brain and how changing your focus can help with pain. I’m a Heal you Life graduate and believe that the mind is powerful. This app just gave me some more tools which may help you as well. Big hugs!!
This was a perfect reminder to take periodic Spirit breaks and just what I needed too.
Sending healing energy to you and Lee!
Thank you for sharing ~ sending prayers and positive healing energy for a quick and complete recovery!
Your words were as if you were reading my journal. Usually a very positive person I am feeling overwhelmed by sadness lately. I know I am not alone in this feeling. How the world has changed…
Your suggestions were excellent ~ I will be setting my watch alarm.
New Moon intentions set April 11th ~ already feeling an energy shift.
Grateful for spiritual intervention!!
Hi Rad & Lee! I relate to this so much! …except I was the one stuck in bed. There’s a program designed by Diamond Dallas Page called “DDPY Re-build” (https://ddpyoga.com/pages/rebuild) that I started last year and am now walking by myself unaided! Maybe it could help? It’s amazing and has been a BIG part in changing my life, so wanted to share with you guys.
Sending healing Love+Light to you, and Radleigh thank you for being a shining happy bright star, you are so Loved!
XX
It seems I am more often than not in a negative space these days. A job I don’t like, a falling out with a friend which, tbh, could be a blessing as he has issues that I can’t help him with other than to be there to hold his hand. Sort of a “him or me” situation as he can be mean and very inwardly focused. However, I feel like things are changing for me tho and that is very exciting! I am going to set an alarm, too, to remind me to be happy and grateful. And wait for the good to come. God bless you both! You’re in my thoughts and prayers!
Dear Radleigh
Thank you for sharing this as I just read it and it was perfect timing for me to help me personally in balancing the ‘good stuff’ with the ‘challenges’. Your articular gave clarity of why it was important to balance verse the feeling of ‘guilt’ of ‘feeling the personal joy’ at a time when there are number of challenges with other members of the family.
Thank you
Sending Healing Love and Light to Lee & you for your highest good.
Thanks for sharing , Rad.
I know exactly what you mean.
Love , healing and angel for the two of you
Monika
Radleigh, I know how hard it is to be vulnerable to share with others. I have been there when the Dark is ready to swallow you whole. But there is light! I send you and Lee healing, light and prayers. Thank you for sharing and for uplifting so many of us every day. Love and light
Much love to you and Lee. Will be sending so many good vibes your way. Thank you for sharing.
Thank you so much for sharing! I have encountered some very “rough patches” in my life and struggled to focus on the positive rather than the negative. Your email inspired me about the important of changing my focus during rough times. I think your positive focus will really help Lee get back on his feet soon!
Best,
Wendy
HEY Radleigh
I am so sorry to hear about Lee’s health problems. You have alot on your plate right now . But thank you for taking the time to reach out to us . Your right ut has helped me enormously in how I look and manage things. I am thinking of you both sending lots of love and light xx
Dearest Radleigh,
I’m so sorry Lee injured himself.
I have been living in pain most of my life and know how Lee feels not just on the outside but on the inside. He’s become a burden on you and its causing him more pain then he knows. Just like my husband you are a blessing from Heaven since very few stick around once a mate can’t be the person they use to be. I wish I could talk with Lee and let him know he’s blessed to have you and his life may have changed but you and all the wonderful old and new memories are still there and waiting for when he’s ready.
My thoughts and prayers are with you both
Thank you Radliegh for sharing the struggles you and your husband have been going through. I recently broke my arm and my husband has been my caregiver. I hate that I need help and have been angry and sad. I have not been talking to the Angels or thanking God for all the good things in my life. Thank you for the wake up call. Thank you for helping me through. You and Lee are in my prayers. Peace and Blessings to both of you.
Thanks for sharing. Many blessings for you, Lee, and the dogs.❤
For many years I kept the heavier things to myself as I didn’t want to give me ‘power’ ~ however I have learnt the opposite to be true. They hold us in that space of feeling suffocated in lack of a better word. My life really changed when I showed up to my life and shared warts and all haha. It allowed me to be seen and that was abit scary ~ it allowed others to share with me and also help me and the more honest I got the more everything shifted into balance. Airing yourself, the whole spectrum allows light to be filtered in from all the places. Much love and balance to you both.
Wishing Lee a speedy recovery! Remember that taffy is pliable, so being able to bend and flow with what happens is imperative. I like the idea of setting an alarm on my phone to pay attention to the good stuff. My email notifications to journal just aren’t cutting it LOL.
Sending you lots of love!
xx
You are a blessing in my life as you are to thousands of others. You are an amazing teacher and author, but you are also human with human challenges. You are handling life’s challenges with grace and strength. Praying for you and Lee.
Radleigh,
Thank you for this message because I needed to hear it this week! Much love and light to you and Lee.
xo Lori
Totally going to do this. Setting an alarm and join in life’s gratitude. Thank you for reminding me of life’s light and love. Much love to you and your household.
Thank you for this! I am also in the taffy middle and I appreciate your reminder to keep it positive, and focus on the blessings and joy! I wish the best for you and Lee. Blessings!
Thank you dear Radleigh for being you and opening your heart to us. You are such a great blessing to those of us who are fortunate enough to walk this life with you. I am keeping you and Lee in my good thoughts and prayers. Sending you both much love.
Hi Radleigh,
when I’ve learned something from going through major physical challenges in my life in the past 10-15 years, it’s to call in help and not do it alone.
I’ve also learned as someone who has a public platform as well that it’s important to share my challenges while I go through them as well as my healing and successes. Why? Because if I don’t share, I keep help and helpers away. And other people draw strength and hope and faith from my sharing of struggles and of overcoming them.
Sending love to you and Lee,
Antje
Thankyou so much for sharing this with us Radleigh- I think it’s helps us who are going through things like this to know we are not alone. Sending so much healing and love to you guys and really hope it won’t be long before Lee gets the help he needs to be back to his full health. Also I just wanted you to know how much you have helped me during the pandemic- you have been like a a ray of light in these dark times- a true earth angel.xxx
Omg Radleigh! This blog just inspires me more, that I have made the right choice to follow you. Throughout your difficulties you have been able to make me laugh, and smile, I think I told you that my boyfriend died of Cancer in 2019, and I felt so lost and scared. Everything is on me now, and finding you and Anna Grace, has afforded me guidance that we are not alone through our difficulties.
I wish you and Lee well.
Self love and compassion for yourself and lee will get you through. With god all things are possible. Best wishes for your happiness. Accidents happen. The power of intention to manifest a physical blessing for lee.